So I just realized that I have never posted about the surgial costs that I've endured by having this surgery. Most of my friends and family don't really care, but this blog is mostly for people having the surgery or considering the surgery....so it's something that should be covered. First of all, unless you get diagnosed with TMJ, this jaw is considered an elective surgery. This was very frustrating to me, considering my underbite had gottten so bad that I couldn't bite correctly and looked quite abnormal from the side. This surgery was definitely not 'elective' for me....or cosmetic. Getting braces was cosmetic for me...the surgery was to correct my bite. I don't understand why insurance companies can't see the difference. So, once I knew that my surgery was termed elective, I had two options from my insurance- have the surgery in the hospital or have the surgery in my surgeon's office as an out-patient. This was a troubling decision for me.
On one hand...having it in the hospital I would have been hooked up to an IV (and IV drugs) all night and would have had nurse's care for at least 24 hours. This was very appealing to me. It also would have helped give Chris a break for an extra day or two. This surgery had to have been hard on him as well (although he's never said so, has never complained and didn't seemed phased at all), and it would have been nice not to put him out. Being in the hospital was also appealing for my high-anxiety self...knowing people were there to help me if something went terribly wrong. On the other hand, my costs were much less doing it out-patient, I was surrounded by people who do this surgery all the time and are use to reactions, etc, and being home after the surgery was somewhat appealing to me as well.
Honestly, I wanted to have the surgery in the hospital- simply for the reassurance that I wouldn't be in pain and that I'd have emergency care a few steps away. In the end, however, the surgical costs were going to be a little over $10,000 more for having in the hospital, so I elected to do it outpatient. In the end, I ended up paying almost $20,000 out of pocket for the surgery. Shocking, isn't it? Trust me, I know. To think of all the things that one could do for all that money! If my teeth hadn't gotten as bad as they did, I never would have had the surgery simply based on the costs....but I didn't have a choice when it came down to it. How does one come up with this amount of money in just a couple of months? Sure, there are lots of options- cash in some of my 401k (and end up losing a lot more than $20k by cashing out), take out a personal loan, pay part of it and charge part of it....and whatever else you can think of. In the end, a true blessing from God is what got my surgery taken care of.
In Jr. High and High School I was very close to 2 girls. We spent almost every single weekend together...and in fact I spent probably 3-4 school nights with them each week. I grew up in the boonies and was very involved at school, so my parents were understanding about me wanting to stay 'in town.' Anyway, spending this much time with my friends was also spending this much time with their families. One of my friends in particular has quite phenominal parents- always very understanding, always supportive, always willing to let me hang out, etc. I really considered this friends' parents another set of my parents. Truth be told, in some ways, they were better parents to me than my own. These two folks will always be dear to my heart and I owe them so much for the way I am and the way I want to be. I love them. One thing about my other parents is that they use to not have too much as far as money/belongings go, but they worked very hard in their live...they paid their dues....they were smart and thrify and dedicated....and it paid off greatly for them. They are now blessed with great wealth- which they put to great use through charities, helping people, bettering their surroundings and so much more. Meeting them and being around them you would never know that they are so wealthy- it's inspiring how they are still the same people although their situation has completely changed.
Over the years, I have always gone to this set of parents for financial advice, loans (to fix cars, to buy a car in high school, etc....which I always paid back), a shoulder to cry on, a buddy to drink wine with, professional advice on my career....anything and everything. Of course I went to them about the surgery- there is no way I wanted to do something stupid (like put it on my credit card) if that would hurt me later and there was something smarter (like cashing out my 401k) for me to do. I did not go to them for a loan...and I never ever considered that....until I got a phone call one night and my other mother said something like "you know, we thought about what you should do, and we thought it would be silly of you to cash in your 401k or charge it on your credit card when we can just loan you the money." I, of course, started crying immediately. It was so caring...so giving....so thoughtful....SO MUCH. I've learned not to mix businesses/money with friends/family, and I figured it was just too much to accept. My other mother convinced me otherwise. She has told me over the years that God wouldn't have blessed her with her wealth if he didn't want her to do something with it- and she feels that if she can make peoples' lives easier/better/happier, then she can and will. She's amazing. So yes, she wrote me a check. And yes, I'm making hefty monthly payments and will pay her back as quickly as I can. It was such a blessing. And you know what? When I am settled...and when I don't have to worry about money anymore....and when I am able to...I am going to help someone else. I may not be able to write them a $20,000 check, but I will make a difference in their lives.
So that's that. As far as my progress goes, I'm doing great. I'm trying more and more foods and find that I can eat most things...just not in public. ;) For example, I can make a sandwich and eat it at home, but I would never eat a sandwich in public because it's just too messy. My problem is that I can't chew and keep my lips together. I can chew, yes...it's just that my mouth is wide open if I open my mouth more than a half-inch. This is not a pretty sight! My jaw is working fine, but my muscles around my jaw and my lips are still getting use to things. For example, I cannot make a 'fish face' anymore- you know, the one where you suck the corner of your lips in? When I try to do it, it looks like I'm trying to pucker. I can't pucker, either. Well I can, but it's not normal yet....looks strained. My top lip is really feeling now, but it is also still a little tingly from the nerve damage...I'm hoping this heals soon. My lower lip and chin don't have much feeling at all, but I can tell they are healing because of the itching and tingling all the time. Once I have all my feeling back I will feel like a normal person again....I'm going to ask the doc when to expect this to come back because I'm getting frustrated. I still can't normally kiss my hubby and feel it! Not fun!
Well, that's about it- let me know if you have any questions! The doc had originally said that I'd be 100% normal as far as my functionality goes (not including the nerve damage/feeling) at 12 weeks...which puts me near the end of February. I'm excited! Enjoy the pics below- I'm cheesin' out.
On one hand...having it in the hospital I would have been hooked up to an IV (and IV drugs) all night and would have had nurse's care for at least 24 hours. This was very appealing to me. It also would have helped give Chris a break for an extra day or two. This surgery had to have been hard on him as well (although he's never said so, has never complained and didn't seemed phased at all), and it would have been nice not to put him out. Being in the hospital was also appealing for my high-anxiety self...knowing people were there to help me if something went terribly wrong. On the other hand, my costs were much less doing it out-patient, I was surrounded by people who do this surgery all the time and are use to reactions, etc, and being home after the surgery was somewhat appealing to me as well.
Honestly, I wanted to have the surgery in the hospital- simply for the reassurance that I wouldn't be in pain and that I'd have emergency care a few steps away. In the end, however, the surgical costs were going to be a little over $10,000 more for having in the hospital, so I elected to do it outpatient. In the end, I ended up paying almost $20,000 out of pocket for the surgery. Shocking, isn't it? Trust me, I know. To think of all the things that one could do for all that money! If my teeth hadn't gotten as bad as they did, I never would have had the surgery simply based on the costs....but I didn't have a choice when it came down to it. How does one come up with this amount of money in just a couple of months? Sure, there are lots of options- cash in some of my 401k (and end up losing a lot more than $20k by cashing out), take out a personal loan, pay part of it and charge part of it....and whatever else you can think of. In the end, a true blessing from God is what got my surgery taken care of.
In Jr. High and High School I was very close to 2 girls. We spent almost every single weekend together...and in fact I spent probably 3-4 school nights with them each week. I grew up in the boonies and was very involved at school, so my parents were understanding about me wanting to stay 'in town.' Anyway, spending this much time with my friends was also spending this much time with their families. One of my friends in particular has quite phenominal parents- always very understanding, always supportive, always willing to let me hang out, etc. I really considered this friends' parents another set of my parents. Truth be told, in some ways, they were better parents to me than my own. These two folks will always be dear to my heart and I owe them so much for the way I am and the way I want to be. I love them. One thing about my other parents is that they use to not have too much as far as money/belongings go, but they worked very hard in their live...they paid their dues....they were smart and thrify and dedicated....and it paid off greatly for them. They are now blessed with great wealth- which they put to great use through charities, helping people, bettering their surroundings and so much more. Meeting them and being around them you would never know that they are so wealthy- it's inspiring how they are still the same people although their situation has completely changed.
Over the years, I have always gone to this set of parents for financial advice, loans (to fix cars, to buy a car in high school, etc....which I always paid back), a shoulder to cry on, a buddy to drink wine with, professional advice on my career....anything and everything. Of course I went to them about the surgery- there is no way I wanted to do something stupid (like put it on my credit card) if that would hurt me later and there was something smarter (like cashing out my 401k) for me to do. I did not go to them for a loan...and I never ever considered that....until I got a phone call one night and my other mother said something like "you know, we thought about what you should do, and we thought it would be silly of you to cash in your 401k or charge it on your credit card when we can just loan you the money." I, of course, started crying immediately. It was so caring...so giving....so thoughtful....SO MUCH. I've learned not to mix businesses/money with friends/family, and I figured it was just too much to accept. My other mother convinced me otherwise. She has told me over the years that God wouldn't have blessed her with her wealth if he didn't want her to do something with it- and she feels that if she can make peoples' lives easier/better/happier, then she can and will. She's amazing. So yes, she wrote me a check. And yes, I'm making hefty monthly payments and will pay her back as quickly as I can. It was such a blessing. And you know what? When I am settled...and when I don't have to worry about money anymore....and when I am able to...I am going to help someone else. I may not be able to write them a $20,000 check, but I will make a difference in their lives.
So that's that. As far as my progress goes, I'm doing great. I'm trying more and more foods and find that I can eat most things...just not in public. ;) For example, I can make a sandwich and eat it at home, but I would never eat a sandwich in public because it's just too messy. My problem is that I can't chew and keep my lips together. I can chew, yes...it's just that my mouth is wide open if I open my mouth more than a half-inch. This is not a pretty sight! My jaw is working fine, but my muscles around my jaw and my lips are still getting use to things. For example, I cannot make a 'fish face' anymore- you know, the one where you suck the corner of your lips in? When I try to do it, it looks like I'm trying to pucker. I can't pucker, either. Well I can, but it's not normal yet....looks strained. My top lip is really feeling now, but it is also still a little tingly from the nerve damage...I'm hoping this heals soon. My lower lip and chin don't have much feeling at all, but I can tell they are healing because of the itching and tingling all the time. Once I have all my feeling back I will feel like a normal person again....I'm going to ask the doc when to expect this to come back because I'm getting frustrated. I still can't normally kiss my hubby and feel it! Not fun!
Well, that's about it- let me know if you have any questions! The doc had originally said that I'd be 100% normal as far as my functionality goes (not including the nerve damage/feeling) at 12 weeks...which puts me near the end of February. I'm excited! Enjoy the pics below- I'm cheesin' out.
9 week front view:
9 week profile:
Look mom, three fingers! Not too far in, but there are three! YAY!
9 week profile:Look mom, three fingers! Not too far in, but there are three! YAY! 
2 comments:
Lookin' good! I think that took you way longer than a commercial break to write!
That was so kind and generous of your "other parents"!... they must be great people!
It is difficult to mix family with business like that, but as long as you try to pay them back and (hopefully do), it should be fine... plus, they seem like such wonderful people that they would definitely understand if you got behind on the loan (not that you would... but things do happen).
Keep doing good and keep us updated... and you need to start a seperate blog about your personal life... you appear to be on the road so much that you must have some time in which you could write it!... talk with you later!
Yay for generous souls!
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